>> Monday, January 5, 2009

I don’t know why I am feeling like this. It’s like something really heavy is pulling me down from my heart straight down to my stomach. I suddenly feel the need to scream out loud at the top of some mountain and just cry.

Heard from people that I have become a little quieter than before. Classmates would turn around and ask what’s up with the silence. Have I become reticent to the people around me? I don’t know. Probably, I just need time to heal. I am still not able to accept some truth.

I have had enough of ostentatious people in my life. Full of pretension! Nah.. I’m not buying that anymore. No more plastics God! Bless me with some purebreds! I seriously need genuine gems that are not in this world only for themselves but at least spare a little thought for others.

So much hatred! So much ill will and deep-rooted dislike. All those resentment and asperity, all those despondency and tears… ENOUGH!! All these have broken me down. This foolishness tires me. Physically and mentally exhausted I have become!

I am just looking forward to tranquility. Free from disturbance and agitation. I hope to stay calm and peaceful. I want to appreciate serenity. Maybe, it is a lot better to be motionless! No hurt and always so calm…

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